Ever had a lingering feeling in the back of your mind that there is something to do yet life gets in the way of accomplishing the task? To be honest, that’s why there’s been a lack of writing on the site during this season of life. For the past two months, I’ve been diligently writing the first three chapters of my dissertation along with a myriad of other dissertation related tasks that commanded my attention. Unfortunately, its not over yet and this is really just beginning (graduation is May 4, 2019). I’m waiting to hear back from committee members about edits as well as waiting to receive approval to conduct my research study. Needless to say, it’s been a hectic few months. Seriously, #whatsummer?
The article photo exemplifies this journey towards the doctorate at this stage: long, arduous, and lonely with obstacles in the way. I can’t think about a time in my academic career that seemed so mountainous and difficult as this doctoral experience. I can see why people tend to stop out of their programs or just not finish. The mental, emotional, and physical toll that this experience puts on an individual is real. In my last therapy session, I talked about coming to the realization that this is a singular journey that truly rests in my own hands. Nobody is going to write my dissertation or conduct my study. It’s up to me how much work I put into this process and is solely on my shoulders. Working full-time doesn’t make things better either, yet I have a duty to my village to complete this doctorate by any means necessary. This is the type of energy I’m on right now. This is the energy that will happen in the face of the comments/feelings that I’ve received from folks saying that I’m not responsive or too busy to do things. Therapy helped me understand that not many people will “get” what I’m doing even if they went on to get advanced degrees. The doctorate is a road less traveled which is why not many people (especially Black men) actually earn one and I will be added to that stat within a year.
I haven’t forgotten about you family and will make a renewed commitment to writing in this space as it is very important to me. I’ll be honest and say that it won’t be as frequent as the past (weekly basis), but I will strive to write something every couple of weeks or so. Hold me accountable if I’m not doing this! I’d love to hear from you about what topics you’d like to hear about and the happenings in your lives. Be blessed and SMILE!