#RealLifeRealTalk

Sorry for the delay in writing to you all Beloveds! It’s been a hectic few weeks with some major assignments for class and even bigger tasks to take care of at work. I haven’t forgotten about you all!

Earlier this week, Lil B (here’s a quick primer on him) inspired another Twitter chat, not associated with his curse called #hiphophonesty where fans shared unpopular opinions they hold in hip-hop. Mind you, I was never really on the Lil B wave (still not for that matter), but I thought this was kind of cool for him to do unintentionally in a society that seems to think alike more times than not. Lil B started by sharing his thoughts on the popular, 1994 hit, “Thuggish Ruggish Bone” by Bone Thugs in Harmony saying:

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Of course, fans and onlookers had a field day sharing their own unpopular opinions that could cause some friendships to end:

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Now, I’m going to disagree with some of the thoughts shared, (there’s no chance that The Carter 3 is better than #2 and illmatic is top 10, period) however I think there’s always a need for some debate in life. As my birthday quickly approaches, I’ve been in a very reflective mindset and I quickly realized that I have some unpopular opinions that I’ve heard in my own life and decided to get real and share my own unpopular truths:

  • #RealLifeRealTalk-College is the best years of your life: When I was in college, I kept hearing this statement almost every year during college and at least once a year afterwards. I get it! There’s never another time in your life where you have so few responsibilities, all of your friends are in one place, and everyone for the most part was just trying to have a good time. Yet, as good of a time I had during college, I can say that life afterwards has been so much better! It feels good to have money, take trips, and achieving my life goals without the foolery that comes with classes every single day. College is just a chapter in one’s life that will have so many more!
  • #RealLifeRealTalk- Student loans are good debt: Bih! If this isn’t one of the biggest lies I’ve ever heard! From my perspective, there’s no such thing as “good debt”, any debt is bad debt. Granted, I’m in the student loan forgiveness program by working in public service (if 45 don’t mess it up).
  • #RealLifeRealTalk-Your true friends are ride or die: Man! This is definitely not true. Throughout my life, I’ve come to realize that I don’t need or want a large circle of friends. I know that there are quite a few folks that consider themselves friends with me when really, they’re just an associate. Not everyone is going to go to the top with you and I’ve realized that it is okay. People that I thought I’d be close to forever and support me only showed their true color and we no longer talk. There aren’t any hard feelings, I just know at some point, you outgrow people and I only wish them the best.
  • #RealLifeRealTalk-You have to have everything figured out before you turn 30: Why do we even do this to ourselves? Why do we subject ourselves to unnecessary stress to “have it all”? Maybe its society, but this idea that we have to be at a million dollars before 30-35 is silly to me. I know people that do it and thats cool, but I don’t NEED a milli to be happy and prosper. I just need happiness. I learned this pretty quickly that everyone has to work on their own time and there’s nothing wrong with that.
  • #RealLifeRealTalk-Marriage is easy: Biggest lie ever (if you’re serious about your marriage!) I believe that marriage is one of the hardest, fulfilling, tiring, and exciting journeys you can ever embark on in life. It takes a commitment on both sides to ensure that everyone is happy, supported, and feeling loved. It’s not easy, but I’m learning how to get better at it every single day.
  • #RealLifeRealTalk- Being Black is bad: Let years upon years of socialization and oppression in society tell it, we are at the bottom of the ranks and don’t deserve a seat at the table, yet, they want to be US! Listen, being Black is one of my favorite things about my life. Is it hard? Uh yea! But nobody said being magical was going to be easy! The power that this melaninated skin gives me an energy, a resilience, a connection with so many others around the world and I love it. I see the looks on some of my lighter pigmented folks aka wypipo and I can see that the look of awe in their eyes. They wonder how can people that look like me still persevere after everything that these systems throw at us. It’s because being Black is a beautifully magical experience that not everyone understands. You can’t explain what it feels like to fly with eagles to a dog.

These are just some of my own truths that I feel contradict a lot of what I’ve heard (and continue to hear) throughout my life. What are some unpopular truths that you’ve experienced or learned in your own life?

 

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